Bhikubai

My parental home is Ahmadnagar. I knew Radhakrishnabai as a friend at Nagar. She had a photo of Baba and she told me about him there. She was worshipping him with Arathi etc. She told me, she wanted to go to him. Her paternal grandfather was a lawyer there. Baba Saheb Ganesh was his name. She resided with him. I was wedded to one at Sangamner and he died and from there in my 14th year I came here, as Radhakrishna Ayi, my friend was here serving Sai Baba (1908).

Gangagiri Baba of Vanjargaon was performing a huge Nama Saptha under the Tamrind trees (near the wada). There was a huge gathering every day and among many pilgrim groups that came, one was from Sangamner and when that returned to Sangamner, it brought from my friend R.Ayi a photo of Baba, a lot of Burfi Prasad and an invitation to me to go over to Shirdi and settle there. I accepted the invitation and came here without jewels and property. I then went and saw Baba. He told me to live with R.Ayi and be busy serving. About the end of 1916 i.e., 1 or 2 months after R.Ayi died, I had gone to Nagar to draw my pension as the widow of a man that died in the war at rupees 6 per month (which I still draw). On my way back, at Kopergaon, near the banks of the Godavari, I was reminded of the fate of R.Ayi, who was burnt there. My mind was all in a turmoil. I had brought over my garland to Shirdi for Baba. When I went to place it on Baba, he said “I don’t want this garland of mental uneasiness”. He did not receive it. H.S.Dixit requested him to take it as I had brought it from Ahmednagar for him with such great trouble. I then went near Baba lifting up the garland with both hands. Then I neared Baba, the garland somehow snapped into 3 parts; one was left in each hand and one fell on the floor. How it got severed like that I could not discover. Baba was simply saying “I don’t want it.”

I had brought with me along with the garland a water melon and some milk sweets and I placed the pedas and the cut fruit before Baba. Baba took them up and distributed them. Then I took a slice and cut off the outer skin and presented part to Baba and asked him to eat it. Dixit also requested him to eat it. Baba then said “This woman was weeping and shedding tears at Godavari and she has brought it with such a troubled heart and so I will not accept it.” The fact was that at the river bank I was weeping and blaming Baba mentally for not having saved Radhakrishna Ayi, i.e., for allowing her to die such a wretched death. Baba knew everything that was in my heart and hence his refusal to accept my present.

Baba at his noonday meal daily gave me a vessel full of food which I took home. On the day of Baba’s expiry, I was greatly agitated at his leaving me desolate and I was weeping at about 10 p.m., in my house saying “Baba I cannot see you again.” I came out and outside my front door I saw a serpent and felt that it was Baba and said “I cannot recognize you in this serpent body I know only your Sai Baba form.” The serpent disappeared.